Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Don't Lose Sight

When I think about it, just 8 months ago I was fresh out of my surgery and not doing so great. Both in the physical sense with my massive Crohn's flare-up, but also emotionally. I was approaching 30 and wondering where my life was going. In just those few 8 months I did turn 30 (horror), but I also went on a cruise, got engaged and bought a house. My life is now radically different than it was such a short time ago. I'm busy with all sorts of plans and running myself almost ragged with everything going on and everything to be done.

But what's it all for? Who am I?

Life can sometimes be a bit like a powerful train. It gets set on a certain track and just gains more an more momentum in that direction. Sometimes we're so busy shovelling coal into the furnace that we forget to climb up on top and watch the mountains go by and feel the wind in our hair. And ask ourselves if this is even the track we want to be on.

It's the journey, not the destination.

A trite statement for sure, but one that is jam packed with real wisdom. Where are you heading so furiously? What's all your busy-ness accomplishing? What is going on in your life and what do you want? What's important and meaningful to you?

The other day I was sitting down to a plate full of watermelon. I was relishing the slurpy feast of fresh natural goodness. I was even exaggerating my munching sounds just for the fun of it. I realized that the restricted diet I was on for almost 10 years left me utterly lacking fresh foods. I also realized that I love fresh foods like fruit and vegetables way more than I thought I did. I almost don't know where to start to incorporate them into my diet more (Maybe I'll start by trying one of Kathryn's Recipes). It's an aspect of who I am that I'm just discovering.

I'm realizing that I have to put down the endless To-Do lists more often and just breathe. Just be myself. Just discover myself. Who is this new person who owns a home and is getting married? Who will she be? What are my new priorities and what are the new areas of my life that I want to focus on? Let the journey begin.

Update Nov 11:

I just started reading this free ebook called "Focus". It's quite eye-opening. Check it out here: http://focusmanifesto.com/.